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2009.07.22

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Yeah, D-Bro's here! Sorry, I'm lame.

Japanese game show update: I was going to write something up this week, mostly to share a joke that my wife made, but I didn't manage to muster up the energy. So here's a short recap, as if anybody cares. Game 1: teams have to kick soccer balls into a goal, but they're wearing goggles that screw up their vision so much that they can't even see straight, which leads to lots of funny kicks at the air and such. Also, they're all wearing male pattern baldness wigs. Game 2: One team uses giant golf clubs to hit rubber balls onto a sticky surface, and the other team has to try to throw as many balls as they can off the sticky stuff. But it's really sticky, so they seem to barely even be able to move. Gross-out hilarity! That's nothing compared to the elimination game, but first you have to know about one of the rare compelling bits of interpersonal drama. Evan and Jamie, two members of the losing team, are totally doozin' it (as my wife likes to say), and their teammates don't like it. They've got good pretext to make the two of them compete in the the elimination game, since Jamie sucks at all the challenges and Evan pretended to be sick so he wouldn't have to work on the punishment task (seaweed farming). Big arguments ensue, and the team can't decide who gets to compete for elimination. That means the other team gets to decide, so of course they choose Evan and Jamie, mostly because Evan is very athletic and competitive, and this is a good chance to get him eliminated. Anyway, the challenge is probably the grossest thing I've ever seen on the show; the amorous pair has to wear pantyhose over their head with a hole cut out for the mouth, then pull the heads off of squids which have been hung up in a row by grabbing the tentacles in their mouth and yanking them downward, with the one who decapitates the most squids winning. It's horrifyingly nasty, but Jamie rocks Evan's ass, leading to my wife's hilarious comment. Due to Jamie's apparent ability to suck tentacles into her mouth and suppress her gag reflex, she says "I bet she gives really good blow jobs." YES! That's my woman, ladies and gentlemen. Good night, and don't forget to tip your waitresses.

"Boy, that Matthew Brady, just a constant source of negativity!"

MY ASS!

"Think about it HARD."

*snicker*

Hard.

*snick*

The two girls Howard and Vince try to pick up are Dee Plume and Sue Denim from the band Robots in Disguise. Dee Plume is Noel Fielding's girlfriend which makes it that much funnier when she's particularly nasty to him.
Also, a hot, piping, cup of love for Saboo and his obsession with the Crunch!

Hello everyone. It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.
I am from Botswana and too bad know English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Provides sales, repair, and restoration services."

Thanks :(. Ozzie.

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