Comics Of The Weak: I Know Panties, And You Sir, Are Not Wearing Any Panties

You should be able to make the boxes produce sound because you are on a computer and the year is 2011.

Amazing Spider-Man # 654
Written by Dan Slott & Fred Van Lente
Art by Stefano Caselli & Marte Garcia
Published by Marvel Comics

Amazing Spider Man

Superman # 708
Written by J. Michael Straczynski & Chris Roberson
Art by Eddy Barrows, J.P. Mayer, Julio Ferreira & Rod Reis
Published by DC Comics

Superman

The New Avengers # 9
Written by Brian Michael Bendis
Art by Mike Deodato, Howard Chaykin, Rain Beredo & Edgar Delgado
Published by Marvel Comics

New Avengers

Batman And Robin # 20
Written by Peter J. Tomasi
Art by Patrick Gleason
Published by DC Comics

Batman and Robin

Wolverine # 1000
Written by Miscellaneous
Art by People
Published by Marvel Comics 

Wolverine 5.1
Written by Jason Aaron
Art by Jefte Palo & Nathan Fairbairn
Published by Marvel Comics

Wolverine

-Tucker Stone, 2011

Comments

[John K(UK)]

I think I see what you did there. Very good. Sadly I may be at a computer in 2011 but I am also at work. Later for the listening. Still, funny and clever anyway before I even get to the content. Bargain!

[Sharif]

I really enjoyed the part where you wished AIDS on Jessica Jones. Really, I did.

She always looks terrible. What was she wearing this time - her usual sweat pants and a loose t-shirt? She's the paper-thin, insipid, pandering representation of the worst characteristics of "femininity" and is held up by basement boys as a feminist ideal when, in fact, she's really the token of a gynophobic writer. I think the only reason I ever (occasionally) pick up New Avengers is to shake my head at the new lows Bendis sinks to in idealizing this bottom feeder.

[Jonathan Baylis]

Hilarious. Makes me miss those videos where comics get thrown at your head. Nina's addition a great bonus! Happy Valentines.

[moose n squirrel]

I liked this a lot. The back-and-forth between Tucker and Nina was really very sweet - I liked the moments of sudden self-consciousness that crop up in the midst of explaining why a particular comic is stupid in the *way* that it's stupid to an obviously disinterested but affectionate listener; I'm very, very familiar with this kind of exchange.

[moose n squirrel]

As for overuse of Nazis... Nazis pop up in comics as often as they do because World War II was the last major war the US military was engaged in that didn't make the US look thoroughly barbaric (mass bombings of civilian targets aside); pulling out the Nazis is a relatively safe way of signaling American nationalism to a largely American audience without having to show, say, Captain America bombing a refugee camp, or Iron Man overthrowing a Latin American republic and installing an Avengers-friendly regime.

Of course, as often as "Nazis" pop up in superhero comics, they're curiously whitewashed Nazis - you rarely see the Red Skull going on about racial purity or discussing plans to eradicate blacks and Jews, or Arnim Zola experimenting on the disabled. Instead, "Nazi" has been stripped of all its historical and political significance to indicate just another bunch of cartoon villains who want to take over the world.

[Lugh]

This really reminds me of when I talk to my wife about comics. We can all relate to this - I'm sure even the most rabid "say anything about Hulk and I'll cut you" type has had this conversation at least once - and you've really created a rebuttal, unintentionally or not, to people who think you're some sort of supermean comics hater: you're just a regular dude, talking to his wife about some comics that happen to be dumb.

Sharif, I honestly do think Jessica was much better when she was the main character of Alias, back when Bendis could be considered an actual writer, and not just a script speweing robot. I don't think Bendis is part of the he-man women hater's club, but he is pandering with how Jessica is now - she's totally the superhero equivalent of the DM's sister who pops her her down into the basement and goes "You guys are STILL down here pretending to be elves?" The dude can write women in other ways, but seriously?

[Sharif]

Lugh,

In Alias, he had her sitting on a toilet, pants down, chain-smoking, berating herself and screeching to herself about Rick Jones porn. It was appalling. I'd read it wondering "what the hell is this bitch up to this month?" It never failed to disappoint, such as her origin story involving her swallowing a barrow full of toxic waste or her getting uppity at a cop for locking her in the drunk tank after they've had blackout sex.

[John K(UK)]

Yeah, I think it's pretty much all 'just work' for The Chaykster at the mo'. He doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who'd consider drawing New Avengers a career fulfilling joy. A way to put umbrellas in his drinks, yes. I'm all about The Howard Victor but even I didn't buy this one.

You are right; Alan Moore wins. Alan Moore always wins. He is The Internet Upsetter Supreme and he will always win. Because he doesn't give a chuff. Alan Moore IS. A-bloody-men. Still, nice to hear today's Top Flight Talent at least show taste in what they, ahem, homage.

Enjoyed listening to this one, you and your good lady make a good double act. Cheers!

[James W]

How can you say he's not a feminist?
http://twitter.com/BRIANMBENDIS/status/38110165064613888

[Spak]

This was pretty entertaining, but if you do it again, can I possibly convince you to turn it into one downloadable MP3 that we could listen to on one of them there portable sound devices?

[AComment]

I like what I'm hearing and I'm not hearing any panties.

However when discussing Superman, how could you not mention the GatMo All-Star Supermen? Isn't that a more likely immediate ancestor than the Fantastic Four? I think it drags the issue down from "homage" to the far murkier depths of "let's bring this charming titbit from a fun non-canon book into continuity and makes it completely fucking joyless, but finally CANON!"

[P.B.]

I preferred reading them.