My Wife: Has Some Choice Words For Brightest Day

Brightest Day #24
Written by Geoff Johns & Peter J. Tomasi
Art by Ivan Reis, Joe Prado, Patrick Gleason, Ardian Syaf, Scott Clark, Norm Rapmund, Vicente Cifuentes, Oclair Albert, Tom Nguyen, Mick Gray, Mark Irwin, David Beatty, Aspen MLT's Peter Steigerwald
Published by DC Comics 

And now for something completely different!

Look, I know. Issue 24 is not really the place to start, you might say. Oh yeah?

Well I say it is! The recap of this comic is so good that, not only did I not feel lost - I will never have to waste my time reading issues 1 through 23!! I've never read a recap quite like this one before...not only does it save me the time and energy of reading a bunch of comics, but it makes me feel both sorry for AND superior to everyone who did. Think of all that time they wasted!

I mean, sure, there's a bunch of stuff that I - or any reader who picked this issue up as their only interaction with Brightest Day - could know more about. But we don't really need to. I got all caught up on Alec Holland, The Green, The Swamp Thing, The Elementals - all of it. And then, just as I got a feel for the back story, the wrap up began. It's like this comic is some kind of super-hero soap opera delivery device for busy executives. Love it!

What's hilarious about reading this comic and only this comic in this series is that it is clear that someone wanted a "do over." Like, they wanted to write about Swamp Thing. But for some reason, they wanted a cleaner Swamp Thing. A "Green" Swamp Thing, if you will. (And by Green, I mean that the new Swamp Thing is a sustainable, um, product. I think. I'm operating mostly off of feelings here.)

Remember being a little kid on the playground, in the midst of trading insults with someone and finally feeling like you were "winning" and then the other person suddenly sings, "I am rubber and you are glue.  Whatever you say, bounces of me and sticks on you." And every time that happened, I'd buy it. They would sing that little song, and I would BELIEVE it. It was a game changer, the phrase that turned everything around. And of course, in reality, you and I both know that it was nonsense. It's just some made up words, and a made up idea that can never ever be true. But for some reason, one person stated it, and belief makes it true. I'm not going to go deep into the social contract on this one, but you know what I'm talking about, right?

I feel like someone just did that to Swamp Thing. They took the big etch-a-sketch Swamp Thing was written on and shook it up for a complete do-over. And I'm fine with buying that, with giving this new take on Swamp Thing that kind of power. I'll agree to believe this, if only because I think it's silly to pretend that I'm planning to go back and read old Swamp Thing comics. I'm not going to do that. This is what that character is now? Okay. That's fine.

At the same time....this is super-hero comics. Do these people not know what they make? This is one of those types of entertainment that's chock full of playground logic, of "I am rubber and you are glue" kinds of reasoning?  Couldn't they have just given the back story as quickly as they did in this issue and started a whole new Swamp Thing series? Couldn't it have been a magic wizard? A wishing ring? An invisible jet?

Why are they trying so hard to act like they're something they're not?

Perhaps I'm going off the deep end here, and don't really know what I'm talking about. Okay, wait a second. I KNOW I don't know what I'm talking about. That's what these whole columns are all about.

Here's the thing. This was one of those reading experiences where I really felt that this stuff is not written for me, and I shouldn't be reading it. Or critiquing it. I mean, this - Brightest Day in particular - is not really for adults. I'm not saying that comics aren't for adults. I would never say that. But this series? It definitely isn't. As I read this I just couldn't imagine that any grown person would have any care or concern for these characters or what happens next, if anything ever does. I mean, in the list of important things in our grown up heads - pay bills, grocery shop, date night with the spouse, errands, carpools, i'm not even going to begin on the subject of children, but you know, kids - I just don't believe that at any place on that list is "find out what exactly is happening with The Green." That's not to say that fiction and reading doesn't have a grown up place in our lives. It totally does. A necessary place. But this plot, this subject matter?  To me it has no parallel. No metaphor. No re-framing or reflection of my life, of anyone's life, through the subject matter. This just feels like a silly story that's not for me, or anyone else that's my age.

I had a similar feeling recently while watching Sex and The City. I loved that show. I watched the reruns all the time because it felt like visiting old friends. I loved Carrie. I loved Carrie and Aidan. I loved it all. But recently I was watching it - watching an episode I've seen plenty of times before - and I was suddenly so turned off by Carrie's behavior. What she said, and what she was doing, and her emotional reality...I was suddenly like, "Oh my God. She is totally unlikeable. What is she DOING? Who does that?" And well, the fact of the matter is simply that I have outgrown Sex and the City. (Almost. Okay - I still watch it on E when I happen to catch it on. But I only watch it with one eye.) 

And I really felt like that reading this comic book. I felt like - oh - I cannot do this. This is not for me. There's just no way.

-Nina Stone, 2011

 

Comments

[Chris Jones]

"Throw the boomerang.

Throw the boomerang at her."

That's actually sort of a genius way of illustrating how out-of-context and stupid all of this is for Nina, many people certainly but ESPECIALLY someone who hasn't been reading the series and doesn't know/care about the DCU.

[Tim O'Neil]

Nina, Mike Sterling, Mike Sterling, Nina.

[Ann Hero]

Can I date your wife?

[Jason Michelitch]

I thought Carrie being awful was at least half the point of Sex and the City.

[moose n squirrel]

Nina, you're awesome.

[Shoulder Buddy]

I'll never read this book, but I want to send Alan Moore a care package over it. And if anyone's response is "Alan Moore doesn't define Swamp Thing", come on. Really?

[Figserello]

"To me it has no parallel. No metaphor. No re-framing or reflection of my life, of anyone's life, through the subject matter. This just feels like a silly story that's not for me, or anyone else that's my age."

Wonderful. I haven't read a word of Brightest Day, but I fear that this says all there is to say about it.

Thanks!