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Fuck dude, they killed Mogo?!

Oh yeah they did. Remember that part in Blue Velvet where Frank Booth explains what a love letter is? Imagine that part, but the role of Dennis Hopper is played by John Stewart. And then imagine that you can kill a planet by shooting it with a sniper rifle that you made out of a black lantern ring.

That's ok. When DC reboots, they're bringing him back and giving him his own book, since they're going to diversify and Mogo appeals to the planet demographic. Sorry, Pluto, you can't play. Oans don't give rings to dwarves. DiDio hates midgets.

The only good thing about that is that your description made me go look up clips of Blue Velvet.

Also, is John Stewart evil now? Do I even want to know?(Talk about your questions you already know the answer to)

Holy fucking shit, Tom Neely, ladies and gentlemen.

He's not evil but he might as well be. Because, you know, when he put on a purple ring he got all gangsta'ed out in some total No Limit Studios fake-ass camo military gear, because the idea of a strong, intelligent black man who doesn't dream of playacting as a cartoon color rap video thug is just too much for the good folks at Deuteronomy Comics to grasp.

Reviews of monthly installments of stories aren't worth reading or writing any more than a book critic should turn in a finished review of just one chapter of a new novel.

I trust Brubaker and Phillips to deliver. They've earned it. Your "Meh, we'll see how it goes..." reaction is way too skeptical. Do you permit yourself to enjoy ANYTHING wholly and without reservation?

What's next on Geoff John's "Fuck Alan Moore" tour of the DC universe? Joker gets a definitive origin, is revealed to be the ancient emotional entity for "Scary Clown" (that's PurpleGreen, on the Emotional Spectrum)?

I don't get all the Alan Moore hate... What did he do that was so wrong? Refuse to suck at the corporate teats of Marvel and DC and get away with it?

This Alan Moore fella, right? In that there DODGEM LOGIC I have read about his attempts to aid his local community via hampers for the needy and campaigning against library closures amongst other charitable and essentially decent and humane acts.

'Slike his addled mind has got himself confused with that "planet that helped people". Who needs that fey "helping people" balls. I hope Mogo died screaming. Silently; because space is a vacuum. Hell, I hear that Alan Moore's been doing that kind of lilac Stalinist shit for years. Yet, in all that time has he written any new Batman comics? Any Wolverine comics? No. No, he has not.

The utter bastard.

"Reviews of monthly installments of stories aren't worth reading or writing any more than a book critic should turn in a finished review of just one chapter of a new novel."

But since new novels aren't packaged and sold one chapter at a time in monthly installments like comic book stories are, then that analogy doesn't really make any sense, now does it?

I really liked the first issue of CRIMINAL, even though I kept disliking it while I read it...? Part of me was constantly saying, "It's just What If the Archie Gang Grew Up to Be Jerks, big deal; there are no happy What If comics" but I enjoyed it anyways, and at the end of it I wanted to read the next one. I always have that experience with CRIMINAL, where I'm always enjoying it and suspicious of it simultaneously. I don't know what else I enjoy that I have that reaction to. But I do like that book. (Plus, an essay about The Great Brain books! Oh god, I loved those-- con men are my favorite things so a book about kid con men ripping off Mormons, man, that stuff was the best...)

re: Walking Dead-- this is a truly dumb question but I haven't read that comic since Tony Moore stopped drawing it-- why don't they just use flamethrowers? I'm sure zombies are scary and all but just burn them, and you're done. After 80 issues, have they really not figured out a way to burn all the zombies? That seems like a long time. It's not just people still shooting at them with guns, is it?

Also, in the Walking Dead, has anyone thought to get on a cell phone and call India? I'm pretty sure we cremate our dead people. I'm in India, the last thing I'm worried about is zombies.

Has anybody in that comic really thought things through?

I seem to have a traditional suspicion surrounding the first issues of Criminal story arcs, with the exception of Dead and the Dying, which still exists for me as one of those rare "perfect" comics. With the exception of Sinners, I always end up liking them. I just don't like starting them, I guess?

Walking Dead is pretty much the same thing over and over again, and no, flame throwers have never taken the place of people in towers using sniper rifles and mumbling bible quotes to themselves.

PS: Here's a review of a Great Brain book written in 1990 by yours truly: http://www.factualopinion.com/the_factual_opinion/2009/11/books11.html

What's with the TS hate? Reading his reviews are worth it if only for referring to DC Comics as the "Playmobile Sex Army."

I have no earthly idea what that means, but it still makes me laugh.

On the John Stewart thing, isn't purple the Compassion color? Does one commonly associate compassion with swag? Was there a Lil B mixtape I missed?

Playmobile Sex Army would be a really great name for a rock band.

The reason people are "mad" at Alan Moore is because idiotic website interviewers don't want to talk to him about anything he cares about, they just mumble about current superhero comics, hoping for hysterics and Moore is all too willing to deliver, most likely to get them to go away.

If you've come to find the guy who hates everything, that's me

I'm bored with Alan Moore.

Alan Bored

Okay, seriously, that Popeye page made my day.

"But since new novels aren't packaged and sold one chapter at a time in monthly installments like comic book stories are, then that analogy doesn't really make any sense, now does it?"

- caleb

Comics are packaged and sold in a stupid way. Right. No argument here.

Playmobile Sex Army could have Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine reform to open for them.

in unfairness to geoff johns, he's shit all over the work of LOTS of better, actually creative writers.

Shitting all over Alan Moore's body of work just gets people's attention the way you don't get when you shit all over Peter David or Marv Wolfman or Mark Waid.

Wait is this dude throwing down against Alan Moore? Like did I actually just read someone imply that Marv Wolfman was a better writer than the dude who basically invented the last 25 years of comics?

Why aren't comics for kids anymore?
Bang! Pow!


I riposte that comics are very much for kids. Young goats-kids, who eat the comics for sustenance, but find insufficient of it. I make the English jokes, yes?

No, AERose. He's saying that nobody cares if someone craps on Marv Wolfman or the like in the way they care if Moore is crapped on. By "better, more creative writers" he meant better than Johns.

Here's why people hate Alan Moore.

See, there's this tree, just a big enormous old thing, and the tree bears fruit. Most of the low-hanging fruit has already been picked, but there's still way more fruit just a little higher up. You might have to learn to climb the tree to get the fruit, you might have to get a ladder, stretch a little bit to pick it, you might end up falling and breaking your neck, or falling and just looking stupid. And the fruit might be unripe, or overripe, or have worms in it. But if you exercise a little care and effort, and don't give up, you can still get some really good fruit.

And at the base of the tree, there's a little trash pile of fruit skins and seeds that have been left by others, and there's this guy who likes to grub around in the pile for bits of fruit in the trash that others may have missed. Some of the trash is already starting to rot and doesn't smell too good, but he's diligent. He knows that, since someone has already eaten the fruit, it must have been really good, and that he's going to glean whatever bits and drops that he can from it, rather than risk his neck climbing the tree to get fruit that may not be as good.

And this shabby old man with a cane walks up to him--he has hair and a beard that looks like hair is basically exploding from his head, and a small menagerie of silver creatures crawling over his hands--and says, son, do you know that you're grubbing through the brown and slimy remnants of my old picnic while there's a tree virtually groaning with fresh bounty right over your head?

And the grubber snarls and says, Go away! You're selfish! And his followers, who have, in fact, lauded him for his grubbing, take up the chant. The shabby old man shrugs, meanders off.

And that's why people are mad at Alan Moore.

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